At the annual “Jimmy’s Day” event today in Shoreview, Minnesota, employees of Century College developed.
The development in question was in accordance with the college’s plan.
“We are pleased to announce that today employees developed,” a college spokesperson said.
An anonymous administrator agreed. “I have never seen such development.”
Faculty are expected to continue to develop tomorrow at an unrelated event in Minneapolis. Further staff development is not expected at this time.
“If you come to the college on Monday, you will see some developed people,” an appreciative employee commented. “I like developing!”
Other duty day headlines:
- Century to Achieve the Bridge to a Dream of Success
- Inspirational speakers somehow depressing
- Police vow to locate missing “display copy” cookbook
- Employee unions demand that future performance reviews be done in a spirit of “appreciative inquiry”
- Following “Locomotion” performance, 15 hospitalized with embarrassment-related conditions
[...] a year), do extra crap, read papers by students who can’t read or write and sit through administration’s sillyness – but, don’t look for me here, I’ll be at the People’s Coffee [...]
Rumor has it that the organizers of next years Jimmys are writing new lyrics to Achey-Breaky Heart. A full two hours is being alloted for employees to talk about why they are great, too. The guest speaker will be from a high school in North Dakota that has found a way to use algebra across the curriculum. The math department, reportedly, is delirious with anticipation. “Finally,” commented one math instructory,”we will make some gains on the English Department.”