Duty Weeks Conclude

Mid-Century Report: August 17, 2050

Today marked the unofficial end of “duty weeks” at Century College. This three-week period of “crucial” professional training is an annual event at the college. The event began on July 25, 2050, with the secretary of the assistant to the vice-president of professional development giving an opening address welcoming employees back to work. The president of the college was not available to attend but greeted workers via a pre-recorded message.

After this joyful welcome, the three weeks passed quickly, with promotional virtual reality movies for various work areas such as radiation compliance and the office for mutated students; motivational, keynote, and inspirational speakers;  breakout sessions on a wide range of topics; and various mandatory morale-building events.

Attendance at the events is mandatory for faculty and most staff. Only faculty members with 25 years of service at the college can have accumulated enough personal and sick time to miss more than half of the “duty weeks” events.

“When we increased the number of duty days to more than the number of allowed personal days, that was a breakthrough,” a spokesperson for the college said. “Now we can go back to school with full confidence that every employee has been compelled to be involved in at least one sing-along, dance, trust-building exercise, or awkward conversation on a topic they know nothing about.”

“Duty weeks” technically continue through Friday, although only faculty and staff in particular areas are required to attend the remaining sessions on blood-borne mutagenics.